Why I think being a Mom is Awesomesauce!

Motherhood

I thought about writing on this for a long time. It’s not just a word.  It’s a way of life. A road that you take from where there is no returning back. It shapes your future which may or may not be what you had in mind.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying it’s a dark place where no one should every head. Maybe, barring some parts. Its like a job you have always wanted and once you are in it for a long time frustration kicks in and you seek out for greener pastures. But in this life job of being a mother or a parent, there is no way out. You are in it for good.

Before a baby came out of me, life was good. Not just good, it was awesome. It was what I now see on the timelines of my single or married (but no kids) friends. Exciting lives. No deadlines to get back home, be it weekends or weekdays. All weekends would be pre-booked with party plans or trips. We were free birds.

The major issues in my life were such that I now find extremely trivial. I would get super hassled if I didn’t make it for my monthly pedicure or didn’t end up taking that road trip that was on my list. Or I didn’t find that one dress in my size which had to wear for a party that very weekend. I would get worked up if we were late by 10 minutes to a party or if I would sweat from the house to the car coz my make up or hair is getting spoilt and I would not get to make a ravishing entry when we reach the party. Now if you ask me, if I can make it for a party no matter how shabbily dressed or late, I am still elated coz I at least made it to a freaking gathering that doesn’t involve legos and minions.

But the point I’m trying to make is that its like life had no meaning or purpose before this. What would you rather remember, the fabulous entry you made at a party or the first time your baby held your finger and started walking and how he enjoyed being the star and that extremely animated cheer from you.

Would you rather worry about the size of the dress you didn’t fit into (well try one size bigger) or the fact that your baby didn’t poop all day and the things you have to do to make sure his bowel movements are intact.

Would you rather make it to your monthly pedicure with aroma oils on a Saturday afternoon or snuggle up in bed with next to your baby with a heavenly baby smell coming from his soft hair.

So Motherhood is about choices. Not LIFE choices per se. But small momentary choices. Its like every now and then you are asked a “what would you do if” type of question. Where you have to choose between what you want and what would you rather do. For me it’s about the latter. I rather have a random conversation with my son in a language only he and I can understand than to sit in a social gathering pretending to be interested in a conversation about bags & shoes.

I would rather sit and watch baby TV and lip sync all the baby songs over & over again than watching the latest episode of GOT. I get all my dope on FB anyway. Also after Agastya, I have developed a distaste for videos with blood and gore & least of all - incest.

All I’m trying to say is I would rather be a mother of beautiful loving adorable baby who loves me with all his heart. Discovering everyday that I have more strength than I ever thought and that I have the ability to shape an actual person into being a good human.

This tiny human, who looks at me like I’m the queen of this world even if I’m in baggy clothes with dried up food stains and messed up hair than having the perfect Instagram life with pictures of weekend brunches, cruises, tote bags and high heels.

I chose this Life. And I don’t regret this for even one second. I may crib and cry on some really bad and trying days. but those are the exact days that I look back upon with a sense of victory and accomplishment. If I can get through those times, then everything else is a cakewalk. Nothing in this world seems challenging or impossible anymore.  Armed with the baby on my side, I am ready to conquer each day. Bring it on bitches!

Want to leave you all with my fav videos on Motherhood ever... enjoy!

The Dichotomy and Hypocrisy of being a Mother

It's never enough. It's either too much or too little. Everyday moms everywhere go through these  (most of the time) pointless dilemmas while raising and nurturing a baby that one can't help but think is this how nature programmed us to be? Is this what life's ultimate purpose is for mothers? To worry and stress themselves sick over insane things like which side of bed to sleep so that the baby faces you and gets equal time sleeping on both sides so that their skull shape is balanced and head doesn't look wonky. 

When in doubt, Google. This has always been my mantra. Through pregnancy and beyond. Ignore what mothers, mom in laws and grandmothers are saying. We are a different generation and we base our decisions on science and proven logic. Inspite of all my educated and over-informed and ever googling psyche, I'm the first one to insist on removing 'Nazar' the moment baby's been exposed to more than 3 humans at a time. Those 3 humans, ofcourse, do live in the same house. I'm the one who will put 'kaala tika' every now and then thinking 'meri nazar naa lage'. Knocking on the wood is my newly acquired musical skill. I rock at knocking on wood and think I may have a good chance featuring on 'Mommy's Got Talent'. 

 We moms don't have a very strong will power. There are days when you'll feel I'm gonna make my baby strong and not take him/her to the doc at the drop of the hat. I know what to do if he shows any signs of falling sick or gets hurt etc. After all Google is my imaginary best friend who always tells me what to do. I also have 3 baby apps. Yup. 3. But then there are these other days, when the first thing I think of is to call the pediatrician for seemingly silly stuff like 'oh baby whimpered a lot in sleep'. 'Or baby was not looking at me during playtime'. 'Baby's pouting a lot these days'. Is it too early to take selfies with baby?? Yeah yeah, it sounds stupid when I write in jest, but at that moment you think of nothing else and you are super confident that this maybe a sign of something serious. 

Like I said,  We moms don't have a very strong will power. You may say, we do what we feel best at that moment. And what's best for the baby. But what really is best for the baby? How do we even know that? Who assigned us to be the sole decider and stress monger for the child? It could be nature, mothers instinct, or God? I'll pick whats convenient for me right now. Tomorrow, my answer maybe different. And it's really okay. No one can judge you for that. I don't care two hoots if someone thinks I'm a super obsessed or an utterly carefree kind of a parent. I'm a hypocritical mom and I have no qualms in admitting it. After all I do have the baby's best interest in mind. Right?  ;) 

21 Things I did the last time I was not a Mom

The last time I went on a sleep marathon. Slept for 8 hours straight. Slept in on weekends. Slept sound. Slept through the alarm. Slept through the phone ringing. Slept without checking if the room temperature was too hot or too cold or too stuffy or too airy, too dark or too bright. If I slept on the right or left side of the bed. If the night lamp was on or off while I slept. Or to simply put. The last time I SLEPT. 

The last time I did regular and daily chores using both my hands.

The last time I watched TV for more than 5 minutes without interruption. The last time I actively watched TV. 

The last time these daily sounds didn't affect me. Birds chirping, pressure cooker whistle blowing, paper rustling, clock ticking,  fan/ac on high speed, fan/ac on low speed, switching a power button on/off, heavy breathing or snoring of self or husband. To name just a few. 

The last time I shopped at leisure. Taking my own sweet time to decide what to buy. Trying dozens of clothes and not buy anything. 

Also the last time I bought anything that didn't have buttons in the front. #nursingmoms

The last time I carried a proper purse/bag. All of my stuff (read wallet and keys) have found a permanent spot in baby's diaper bag. 

The last time I absolutely had to leave home carrying insane amount of junk in my bag. That were not just wallet or keys. 

The last time I left the house without mentally calculating the hours I will be out for and therefore the number of diapers, food or change of clothes I need to carry. For baby of course. 

The last time I left the house after spending a few guiltless, self obsessed minutes in front of the mirror. 

The last time my phone storage wasn't about to burst with photos and videos every 2 days. 

The last time I thought about the availability and hygiene condition of a diaper change room before waltzing into a mall or public place.

The last time I travelled without thinking if the journey was too long or short, bumpy or smooth. Travelled alone and not come back feeling guilty for spending a few extra minutes more than what was planned, away from home. 

The last time I travelled light. Actually scratch that. I never travelled light. 

The last time I bought size: medium. #sniff 

The last time my conversation with another person didn't involve talking/complaining/gushing/crying about the baby 

The last time I didn't judge myself for taking a good or a bad decision over pointless things like buying a fabric conditioner. 

The last time I never ever thought of buying a fabric conditioner. 

The last time I cried at the hospital for myself. The last time being lax and didn't mind not treating a common cold, fever or cough almost immediately at the first sign.   And the last time I hated taking medicines.

The last time I never thought about the  colour, quantity, consistency and frequency of poop and piss.

The last time I was happy just being two. 

The last time I had a life without this little baby devil in my arms. 

#HadtoEndonanEmotionalNote #AMomAfterAll