It's never enough. It's either too much or too little. Everyday moms everywhere go through these (most of the time) pointless dilemmas while raising and nurturing a baby that one can't help but think is this how nature programmed us to be? Is this what life's ultimate purpose is for mothers? To worry and stress themselves sick over insane things like which side of bed to sleep so that the baby faces you and gets equal time sleeping on both sides so that their skull shape is balanced and head doesn't look wonky.
When in doubt, Google. This has always been my mantra. Through pregnancy and beyond. Ignore what mothers, mom in laws and grandmothers are saying. We are a different generation and we base our decisions on science and proven logic. Inspite of all my educated and over-informed and ever googling psyche, I'm the first one to insist on removing 'Nazar' the moment baby's been exposed to more than 3 humans at a time. Those 3 humans, ofcourse, do live in the same house. I'm the one who will put 'kaala tika' every now and then thinking 'meri nazar naa lage'. Knocking on the wood is my newly acquired musical skill. I rock at knocking on wood and think I may have a good chance featuring on 'Mommy's Got Talent'.
We moms don't have a very strong will power. There are days when you'll feel I'm gonna make my baby strong and not take him/her to the doc at the drop of the hat. I know what to do if he shows any signs of falling sick or gets hurt etc. After all Google is my imaginary best friend who always tells me what to do. I also have 3 baby apps. Yup. 3. But then there are these other days, when the first thing I think of is to call the pediatrician for seemingly silly stuff like 'oh baby whimpered a lot in sleep'. 'Or baby was not looking at me during playtime'. 'Baby's pouting a lot these days'. Is it too early to take selfies with baby?? Yeah yeah, it sounds stupid when I write in jest, but at that moment you think of nothing else and you are super confident that this maybe a sign of something serious.
Like I said, We moms don't have a very strong will power. You may say, we do what we feel best at that moment. And what's best for the baby. But what really is best for the baby? How do we even know that? Who assigned us to be the sole decider and stress monger for the child? It could be nature, mothers instinct, or God? I'll pick whats convenient for me right now. Tomorrow, my answer maybe different. And it's really okay. No one can judge you for that. I don't care two hoots if someone thinks I'm a super obsessed or an utterly carefree kind of a parent. I'm a hypocritical mom and I have no qualms in admitting it. After all I do have the baby's best interest in mind. Right? ;)
